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April 13th  2010

It’s always been my understanding that one can, with some degree of accuracy, predict the future. Contrary to popular opinion this can be accomplished without any supernatural, or paranormal intervention. And the individual performing the exploit requires no degree of psychic acumen. It’s also been clear to me that some short-term predictions can be made by simple yet careful observation of behavior, statistical probabilities and environmental factors and stressors. For more complex examples, we can look at how environmental engineers use statics to predict climate variations by combining past data with the latest climate change analysis and research. Actuaries, apply mathematical and statistical methods to assess risk in the insurance and finance industries with high degree of accuracy. These sciences are extremely useful in the business arena and are essential to maintaining balance in local and global markets; they also reflect the high-level numeracy for which the human mind has potential. And it is a similar potential that I have witness during my interactions with a dying man.

His story is short and at the same time difficult to believe. Frank Macri, or Frank Anteros as his online profiles labeled him, giving his words and rhetoric so much more meaning – died from an unknown cause.

Anteros, his well-chosen pseudonym, is the Greek name for the mythological god of requited love, or love returned. He was also the punisher of those who scorn love and the avenger of unrequited love. According to the Greek myth his parents Ares and Aphrodite gave him to his brother Eros as a companion. Anteros’ lesson is that love should be returned in order for it to prosper and grow.

Although he often described himself as a simple man, frank was not simple at all. He was intelligent, very persuasive, and persistent. He also had a very especial ability to understand human behavior, which as he explained, he acquired during his early years living in an abusive household. His story is even less simple than his personality and it begins with the death of his mother. And it ended with his at the early age of 33. Frank lost his mother at the age of 5, which left him in the care of an alcoholic father who neglected to care for him and his two siblings, Laura and Stephan, both younger by one and 2 years respectively. Shortly after his mother’s passing Frank was taken into child custody and later assigned to foster care, which unfortunately separated the remaining family. His father, now incarcerated for several crimes, including several B&A charges, and armed robbery was not seen or heard by Frank since his 7th birthday, when he received a pendant of the Mythological god mentioned before.

Foster and government child services facilitated education and health care for Frank. Being a dedicated student he excelled in elementary and secondary schools, which lead to an extremely successful higher-learning career.

A master degree in computer sciences, a degree in behavioral psychology and a minor in religious studies, gave him the technical knowledge and credentials to acquire well paid, high-level employment in a very specialized government department, which dealt with matters of national security, both, internally and related to foreign affairs. His life experience, his loses, and his incredibly turbulent past provided him with a deep understanding of the things people do and why we do them. As he once put it himself; “what university taught me, is less than 10% of what life has shown me” and loosely quoting the humanistic approach of Dr. Carl Rogers, he continued, “What I Know about people, I have definitely learned from people”. He attributed his accurate, and at times unbelievable empathy to his experience and what he had observed from those around him.

His technical and scientific education and his life experience made him the perfect amalgamation of scientific, secular knowledge and emotional intelligence. It was, by his own admission, his suffering, that had given him and fine-tuned his understanding of people.

Frank came into my life only a few months before his death. In this short time he shared with me many of his principles and ideas, which where so close to my own and in a way expanded on my past work. He also explained to me many of the essential principles that I was ignoring. He reminded me of the importance of suffering and pain and how we must allow it to make us stronger. This ideal would seem to many who read this as a very negative way to live yet it is exactly the opposite. He re-opened my eyes to the truth of love and how important it is to remain faithful to its cause as it brings power and understanding. He reassured me that compassion was a good tool, but as I had always understood, it is a tool that needs to be used intelligently and with an open mind. He told me that I was right in never giving up, that a true hero should never back away form a challenge and that a lost cause, is not lost, it’s most importantly a cause.

Frank’s death was long and full of pain and anxiety, it was 5 years long and one of the clearest examples of a broken heart. As many of us will do, only once in our lives, Frank fell in love. It is because of this “choice” that it was impossible for him to move on from what happened to him. He was 25 when he met the object of his affection and decided that he would give her his all and made the choice to love her unconditionally. He was 27 when he lost her.

He lost her due to an unfortunate misunderstanding that led her to leave without a simple good bye, and leaving no trace for him to follow. Her departure was swift and violent – setting the pace for the culmination of Frank’s story….